Releasing Truth for My Heart

I watch my pen scroll the words across the page.  I didn't know the revelatory nature of what was about to be written.  That it would be an answer to a prayer that I had never spoken out loud but only in deep guttural utterances of the soul.  I didn't want to believe that I felt this way but stuffing it down into the abyss of the unlovely was not the way to fight this goliath.

My pen lifted from the page...I stopped and read the words slowly...sounding them out as if it were a new language...something I couldn't understand but hoped in the linguistics of each syllable something recognizable would jump off the page.  And it did...oh, yes, it did! The words spoke:  HE HAS NOT FORGOTTEN ABOUT ME.  Without missing a beat my brain replies "I KNOW!"  My heart pauses and begins to choke out the words "I.DIDN'T.KNOW"  I gasp as I realize these words were written for my heart to see and to know and to believe...revelation.

Prayers unanswered, it can feel like silence is setting in all around me.  I watch the miracles rise up for others...but where is my miracle?  It's too ugly to ask that question to a God that I KNOW is near and is good so I scold the thought and bury it deep inside never wanting to catch a glimpse of it again!  Threatening all that's within me to keep that ugly nonsense hidden away.  But this cancerous lie began to spoil the good that surrounded it and the stink would rise occasionally.  My offense would lay seemily dormant until a weak moment when my guard was down or my heart was open and the stench was too much for anyone to bear.  And bear it on my own, I could do no more.

"Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you!" Isaiah 49:15

He knows the truth...He IS the TRUTH. And the truth is He carries the revelation you need...He has not, and will not ever forget about you!

(see picture at https://www.pinterest.com/pin/98938523044551401/)