The reverent and worshipful fear of the Lord is the beginning (the chief and choice part)
of Wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is insight and understanding.
Proverbs 9: 10 (AMP)
Wisdom, understanding, insight and knowledge. On an honest and raw level, I am lacking. Mutation of the biological is not the cause. It's deeper and more unknown than that. It's without the fullness of the Spirit that I can never truly be or know beyond the lacking. The completeness which comes only from my Maker, my perfect Jesus, is the bread to fill me and and drink to water me and make me grow...to give me life.
Sometimes my ego gets the better of me...I see all the things that I do know and all my abilities in comparison to the rest of the half lacking, raw and naked bag of bones that surround me...and I feel pretty good. But when you compare yourself to dust it's easy to come out on top. To compare imperfection to imperfection can make this black hole seem bearable...maybe even normal or desirable. My imperfect and finite state is not all these ticking and moving moments are all about....these moments I call my life. I long for something greater...a purpose...beyond this bag of bones covered in dust and dirt and maggots.
This finite and decaying world is limited in it's offerings. Because all the things of this life are just that...dust! So I start the quest for more....and not more dust but more of that which will never scatter and die...will never burn up...will last forever. I want eyes that will see beyond the dust and bones in front of me. Where my soul and heart become my vision...where I'm not limited by MY vision...I know my limitations...and I'm not ashamed to run after more. My scope has to become someone else's though...someone who is not dust... I want to see life from the spirit...insight and understanding unlike any bag of bones would ever see.
But where does this kind of living...insight...revelation begin? How can a bag of bones know where to run or what to chase after? How can the imperfect tap into the perfect...the fullness...the alpha and omega....beginning and end? How do I not waste my limited mind on useless scattering things? The reverent and worshipful fear of the Lord is the beginning... it's the chief and choice part (Proverbs 9:10 AMP)....it's the CHIEF and CHOICE PART! Don't waste your effort on anything else.
But doesn't fear sound limiting? And my Maker says be anxious about nothing (Philippians 4:6). Can I trust this conundrum? A conundrum of the flesh that rises up...that doesn't naturally rest in the shallow groove of the limited mind. Dust can't fathom higher wisdom... love your enemy...turn the other cheek...God incarnate...born in a barn...bled on a cross...humbled himself before bags of bones. Can such backward ways actually be right side up? Can the dust have somehow scattered the truth...turned me into the center... the lies into truth turned fear into a weakness? But THIS fear, this chief and choice part is based on reverence...on worship...on a bowing of the knee...a humbling of the self...because I know my standing, my place....my inadequacies. And this fear is the beginning of Wisdom....the chief and choice part of wisdom. The wisdom I knowingly lack...the wisdom I long for but has never been a part of this bag of bones...this scattering dust.
Confused and frustrated I drag this bag of bones through the dust of the wasteland...not realizing that confusion and frustration is not the truth but only the filter I use. When you're limited in understanding, on the simple basis of not being the Almighty Creator, the author of eternal perfection and wisdom, it's easy to refuse to open your eyes and your ears to the Word that could maybe, just maybe, change it all. Open you up to the chief and choice part...the point of all of it all...I don't want to miss this!
The choice is mine. The response to this dare of sorts...this dare to live fully is mine to activate. Do I respond to my Maker's simple instruction to tap into His eternal purpose? Do I long for the beginning? Because you can't reach the end with fullness and grace and wisdom by skipping over the beginning. The chief and choice part.
(see pictures at http://www.pinterest.com/pin/98938523038543363/ http://www.pinterest.com/pin/98938523038543358/)
